So...I am not really all that sure of who really comes to this anymore since I am almost positive it has been more than a year since I graced this page with any thoughts of mine...so this first entry will just be...a tester of what I can say, and what I cant. So I am coming to the end of my first year of college and it was everything I expected it to be. I have so many mixing emotions about everything that has happened to me in the past 9 or so months and quite frankly...I am just too ashamed and embarassed to put them all down here and they seem to just jumble around in my brain. It is not until I sit and think about each thing that has happened since the day I walked onto this campus that I am able to put together some pieces of this strange and impossible to really finish puzzle. I cannot say I will not completely love moving all of my stuff out of this dorm and closing this chapter of my life forever...no I will totally love it when I can leave this campus and not look back. But that is all I have for now...I am getting yelled at for not laying in bed!

Hello...deary,

   Ah its been so long.  Ah I have such horrible cramps.  Ah thank god for it though let me say the last month and a half a lil too stressful so I praise the pain and everything that comes with it...such as serious relief!! lol. Well this weekend was damn good.  Im so sick of school you have no idea! not even the slightest idea trust me when I say this.   I just want to leave the second school starts.  Thank god for moose...he is probably the only reason I go! To be with him...I love him so much!

Well I tried to get an icon it took forever n didnt work so Im sick of the net.  Goodbye my dears.

Hey People

   Well lets see here.  This weekend was great! Beyond great!  Things are good right now...if time would just leave me the fuck alone everything would be perfect you know...Im just waiting for that one card to fall that knocks my whole castle over.  Im sure everyone knows what Im talking about!  So lets see Friday umm Joelemus came over...really I dont remember nething.  I went to work, and then OH I went to his house for a little while, watched american idol.  *ok Im at work alone, and its closed and such and I feel like Im in a ghetto! Its scary back here at night!! Between car noises and doors closing, Im just plain freaked!! lol and then I start to scare myself so Im makin this quick so I can get out of here!!*  Then when we got done there we went to my house and played Bingo with my sisters and then we went upstairs and such. lol I am so happy right now.  Yet Im so scared!! Everything is so perfect leave me alone!! lol did something new that Im happy we got over with cause I love LOVE love it!!!!!! Yes I fricken do!! God Im in love!! Neway then Joelemus left, very sad as always.  Then Saturday I was hoping Joel would come to my house before work but noooo Im not good enough lol so after noonish rolled around I was getting sick of waiting for him and crissy called so she came over and then we went to her house to print pics and then we went back to my house and babysat and scrap booked.  It was really quite fun and the pages we made turned out quite cute! IT is NOTTTTTTT!!!!! easy to scrap book at all!! lol neway so then she left and joel came and saw me after work for a lil while and that was fun.  Then Sunday Joel called and said we had to go pick up his contacts and glasses and I was lookin crappy but he said I would have to leave now so I left...looking like shit lol and we went to the mall then came back to his house where he wanted eggs, didnt have butter so we went to dons and got me some chapstick and picked up some butter.  Then went back to his house, make eggs and watched tv.  basically just "hung out" ahahaha damn good time.  neway then joel decided he wanted to go to a movie so we went back to my house so I could wash my hair and such, got cute and headed for greenbay.  Went to aero to use joels 50s and then headed to taco bell cause I was STARVING!! and ate in the parking lot cause thats what we do! lol ...went to Cheaper By the Dozen 2...not bad but it was freezing in the theater!!! Honestly I shivered through the whole damn thing and so I just wanted to leave so I could WARM UP! lol then we headed back to my house and joel didnt feel good...I felt so bad!! I just wanted him to stay with me so I could make him feel better! So he left so he could make curfew and I went to bed.  Monday....today...didnt have school so I sat around..was really crabby wanted joel there very early but no! lol he came at like....12ish or later who knows!! lol and made me happier.  We made pizza and banana splits.  then layed around trying to sleep til my mother got home and me and joel hung out upstairs lol got unjured but it was TOTALLY worth it lol.  Neway I would just like to add I am scared so Im leaving!! lol this weekend was good....I miss Joel cause he is at work! aww well...whats new! so I must head out...hope everyone else had a good weekend.  Love you peep-hos!!

During the past year I have done the following marked with an X!!

(x) stayed single the whole year.
( )got your first kiss (yea def NOT)
(x) kissed someone new
( ) made-out for the first time (lol no)
( ) made-out in/on a car (I wish!)
( ) kissed in the snow
( ) kissed in the rain (Also wish!)
(XXX!!!) fell in love
( ) fell in love with a fool
(x) had your heart broken (sorta)
( ) broke someone else's heart (I hope not)
( ) had a stalker
(x) had a good relationship with someone (have a GREAT)
( ) questioned your sexual orientation
( ) came out of the closet
( ) got pregnant
( ) got someone else pregnant
( ) had an abortion
( ) gotten married
( ) had a divorce
( )had a gay marriage
( ) kissed someone of the same sex
( ) dated someone you'll never forget
(x) done something you've regretted
(x) lost your love (I dk...more like lost and then found)
( ) lost faith in love
( ) kissed under miseltoe (again...I wish)

WORK/SCHOOL

( ) got a promotion
(x) got a pay raise
( ) changed jobs
( ) lost your job
( ) quit your job
( ) dated a co-worker
( ) dated your boss
( ) dated your boss' daughter/son
( ) got fired from your job
(x) got straight A's
(x) met one teacher you really like
(x) met one teacher you really hated
( ) found the subject you love
( ) failed a class
(x) cut class
(x) skipped school
(x) got into a fight/argument with a classmate (Im a very verbal person!!!)
(x) did something you were proud of
( ) discovered a new talent
(x) proved yourself an idiot
( ) embarassed yourself in front of the class
( ) fell in love with a teacher
( ) got a lead in the school play
( ) made a varsity team
(x) made junior varsity team
( ) were involved in something you'll never forget
( ) got sent to the office

OTHER

(x) painted/drew a picture (fricken always!!)
( ) wrote a poem
( ) ran a mile
(x) listened to music you couldn't stand
(x) double-dipped
(x) skinny-dipped
(x) went to a 'sleepover'
( ) went to camp
( ) threw a surprise party
(x) laughed till you cried (EVERYDAY!!)
( ) laughed till you peed in your pants
(x) flirted shamelessly
( ) visited a foreign country
(x) cooked a disasterous meal
(x) lost something important to you
(x) got a gift you adore (my puppy!!!!)
(x) realized something new about yourself
(x) dyed your hair/got hightlights
( ) came close to losing your life
( ) someone close to you died
(x) went to a party
( ) drank alcohol
( ) drank alcohol underage
( ) tried drugs
( ) got drunk
( ) got arrested
(x) read a great book (HELLO...Im in school Ive read tons!)
(x) saw a great movie
( ) saw a movie so scary it made you cry
(x) saw your favorite band/artist live
( ) saw someone famous in person
(x) did something you want to tell everyone

WOOHOO! Ive seen this thing everywhere lol figured Id fill one out for myself! Love ya peephos!

Hello Folks!

    Well Im fully rested! lol so hopefully I wont be licking ne deodorant and hey Im going home today!!!!!!! Not til later but the point is Im GOING home!! I have so much homework though and dumb me Im totally pushing it off I still have a paper to write but hey its on a book that I have NOT read yet but I think Im just gonna read it on my way home!! Hopefully I dont get carsick from that cause I usually do lol.  I need to get home! I miss Joel so fricken much!! And it annoys me that Im so dependant on him!! lol But hey what can I say...I also love it that Im dependant on him!!

Aww well Im moving on...I was going through some old pics and was gonna put them on here....but I figured Joel would kill me since they would take up space and prob F* up the text so lol ur loss.  But I must head off and find something else to do.  Love ya and miss you!

.:.\-/aLe/\/\uS.:.

Hello Children!

   *New Edition* The best thing is...no matter how bad a day you have, each day, whether its something you did or something you said or saw, there is always one moronic moment to the day!! So my "new edition" to my entries is the moronic moment of the day!

Moronic Moment Of The Day:
So...today I took a shower and was sitting on my bed going through my bag.  My deodorant slipped out the side so I was like hey Ill put that on so I opened the thing and I was like this smell reminds me of something.  So I smelt it again and my brain *now wait mind you I had very little sleep last night!!*...and my brain was going through all the things it could be and I was like it smells like some guy....no...it smells like some store...no and my brain is just going through all these things so neway I put it on and then I was like WTH does it remind me of so I smelt it again and my brain was like some food youve eaten in the past and for some reason that I still have no idea what it was!! my brain was like well ull never know unless you taste it...so I licked it! YEA MY DEODORANT!! IT WAS SOO DISGUSTING!! And the second my tongue touched it I was like WTF EWW! omg I totally do not recommend licking it ever like if you feel the need....STOP YOURSELF!! lol before ur brain takes over!!  So I def think that tops the bill for this moment of the day!

So....last entry I said my father was bringing me to a surprise neway so we left the house and headed to Madison...I fell asleep on the way there...surprise surprise but only for like 5 min lol.  So first we had to go to Menards and I decided to stay in the car so Im rocking out to run it and all these people were looking at me lol I laughed.  So then my dad came back and hes like well that didnt take long enough and I was like what and hes like well our reservations arent until 6:30 and it was 5:30 so since I didnt feel like going newhere else he just drove there and we pull in and I was like well is this it and hes like yea.  It was a Japanese food place and for some reason I was annoyed cause he was like well we can sit at the bar for an hour and I was like ugh! Fine! so then we walk in and it is SOOOO FUCKING COOL!! We go to the desk and they are like well we will seat you as soon as possible but you can sit at the bar til then. So I start looking around and theres a fountain when you first walk in and then straight ahead there are these two hallways that lead to the back and on each side are curtained doorways with peoples shoes on the outside on these benches!! It was so cute! Guys!! if you want to bring someone on a date that the girl would thing was incredibly fun and cute...this is the place to go...and then to the left and right there are two big rooms with grill tables....(a grill connected to the table with like I dk 9 chairs at each) well ok so we sit at the bar for like 5 seconds when they are like ok we can seat you now.  Well we were at a table with 2 other "parties" So we sit down and all introduce ourselves and it was incredibly fun!! There was a party of 4 that we really didnt talk to on the opposite side of the table but there was a party of 3 one being a snotty lil rich kid next to us that we talked to the whole time and in the end found out that my dad and the other guy worked at the same place and both know this same guy and it was crazy and the guy was REALLY nice!! So neway we order and then this chef guy comes out with a wheely thing of food and knives and all that jazz.  Well he introduces himself and starts throwing the spatula everywhere which was fricken awesome! and then he put tons of shrimp on the big grill and did this awesome knife move to remove the tails then he used the spatula to fling them in the air and into this bowl lol and then he threw them up and onto his hat lol the really funny part is the guy next to us on a dif table couldnt get the shrimp tails to land where he wanted so he just picked them up and put them in his hat it was damn funny! And then he made this like volcano out of an onion and put some oils and such in it and lit it on fire NOW THAT WAS CRAZY! the flame was F*ing huge!! But damn awesome!! And at the end he did this music thing with the grill and AH it was really funny and quite interesting and I swear I ate nothing I ended up bringing like EVERYTHING HOME!! Cause I dk I wasnt hungry lol!! Then we got lost on the way home and I had to pee really bad!! I swear my father almost kills me everytime Im in the car with him! lol Beckies coming with me next time I come here.  Thank god I cant come here alone ever again!! Well Im watching some sex show so Goodnight!

Hey my dears...

Well I need to get out of here....this is my 4th entry today lol Im pathetic.  I really feel like going out tonight...I talked to beckie on the cellular earlier and she got me in the mood to just go out but nope....no one to go out with!! Damn this constricting town!  I was gonna do like all my homework today also and yea didnt get around to that.  I did do like 4 precalc assisgnments so I only have like I dk ten left!! lol Otherwise Ive just been playing games on the puter and thinking about maybe going to take a nap but I cant I dont have time nemore! Though the 3-4ish hours of sleep last night is starting to catch up with me...I have a killer headache...but it could be from Ashley Simpsons...Lo Lo Lo Love but Im not sure.  Im thinking its the sleep....just a guess.  I have to go take a shower in like...ten minutes! You know what video I like...beat of my heart! I mean Ive always had a soft spot for duffs music but its only cause I always liked that she was chubby and now that shes totally opposite...I still like her music lol pathetic...I told ya! My dad told me that at 4:30ish we are heading to Madison and going to Menards or something and then we are going out to eat...but he wont tell me where.  Im thinking it is Chinese but since he wont tell me I really have No clue!! So Im just waiting around for 3 when Im gonna hop in the shower! WOO! and then get dressed and leave.  But Ill be back sometime tonight!

I would have to agree with Teal on this one.  Im REALLY excited for Snowball but I still need a dress or an outfit or whatever!! So lets go shopping girls I need a dress or skirt or whatever! I need it...bottom line! Hey! maybe I can wear my brown halter that I wanted to wear to the hurricane dance but couldnt since I had to wait til christmas to get it! It is damn cute!! Well neway its almost three I must head off to actually do something for once today! lol Love you peeps....Miss you ALL!! *Joelemus the most!!  Yea its true I miss him more lol....its slightly depressing !!*

.:.\-/aLe/\/\uS.:.